Was I dick tonight he said to me. Hmm I pondered how I was going to answer that question. We were at the country show. It was late. I was tired. He was tired. The kids were tired, I was hungry and I had just hurt myself on one of the show’s rides called the Extreme..note to the showies a little padding on those metal bars wouldn’t go astray. What I had to say if I was to answer that question probably wasn’t going to be nice. I pondered the importance of saying what I would like to say.
Clearly he knew he had been a dick was there any point in going on with it? Any point in saying why yes you were sort of a unnecessary kill joy tonight; all at the risk of him get his back up and an argument insuing? Which would result in me missing out on getting something to eat, unimportant things said and an argument which would leave me even more tired and cranky. Then to cap it off a horrible ride home. No I decided having an arguement over he being a dick or why he had behaved like one which I guess somewhere along the way was possibly going to be my fault wasn’t important enough and answering his question or pursuing it further wasn’t important enough to miss out on dinner even if that something to dinner was Mc Donald’s.
So instead I looked at him smiled held his hand and said can we go get something to eat I’m hungry. He looked at me knowingly.
Diffused. Sigh.
The ride home was silent but that was because he was in deep thought, the kids tired and me; I was enjoying the silence.
As a result of this diffusive action on my part paid off- gosh that makes me sound clever and spy like. The next day I was given asleep in, a bacon sandwich and two bunches of flowers none of which would have had happened if had I said why yes you were a dick to his trick question the night before.
So marriage tip number seven (and you can read more of my marriage tips none of which have the backing of a university degree but of life here, here, here and here) is work out whether is it worth the argument. Is it that important. Will it really make a difference? What’s more important being right, telling them some thing they already know, giving your two bobs worth to something that won’t make a difference really or filling your belly? Sometimes not all the time filling your belly is the better option.
What do you think my sweets? Are you a diffuser? or a pursuer ?
xx Deb
