a fifo wife {fifo life: how to: guests and staying friends}

Okay so I’m going to blow my own trumpet doesn’t happen often but this I know I’m good at. I’m not good at craft although I am a DIY queen just not of the craft variety, I cant play a musical instrument, cant bake macroons nor subtract in my head but what I am is a good host. I know how to take care of people. Come stay with me and you will have a good time weather your family or a stranger. I take pride in the fact I’m a good host (well given my return rate I shall assume I’m a good host) I love having the house full. I love to take care of people, its my thing which is why I guess I’m good at it. I have also had to sleep in my fair share of rather revolting spare rooms (sorry) where the smell woke me as opposed to the alarm (sorry again) so I vowed I would never allow that to happen under my roof. It made the whole stay awful, like I was an imposition, now I am more likely to stay at a hotel. Sound like a social snob? No I just think if someone has taken the effort to fly/drive to see you then they are worth the effort to fix up a room. Its not particularly hard even with three kids attached to your ankle. If I can do it any one can; so with it being that time of year when extra bodies come to stay this is my how to on the guest room and few extra bits to make sure you stay friends for the after.

The first thing and its not rocket science when you have guest’s that you know are arriving (tough luck on unexpected arrivals, take what your given sunshine) have fresh sheets, a blanket and aired pillows on the bed. I once went and stayed with a second cousin whom not only didn’t change the sheets but left evidence of the previous couples her stay. Gross on so many, many levels  I had travelled along way to see her and its now been a long time between visits.

Have the room relatively tidy. In other words transfer the major junk to the shed or better still purge it; its the perfect opportunity if you have the time. A room filled with junk and I mean wall to ceiling stuff of boxes, bikes and the pram you haven’t had to use for three years but cant seem to part with stuff not a few books here and there. Move it. Excess stuff in a guest room adds a little ‘I knew you where coming but didn’t care enough to get my crap together’ feel to it despite the clean sheets. A room that’s cluttered well it stresses me out and so a stressed out guest who is already out of their comfort zone is generally not ideal.

If the room allows have a little chair. It doesn’t have to be your favourite Edwardian tub you don’t want them to settle in and stay that’s not the point of a guest. A little dining chair somewhere for them to sit and put their shoes will do the trick nicely. Have a beside table, even if its another little chair beside the bed (hence the word beside table) and a lamp for them to read by at night or fumble around in the dark by.

Give them two clean towels, a bar of soap and a washer for each person; if you can at least one towel, accommodating that room, leave it on the bed or chair. This not only is a courtesy from you but it helps refrain them from ravaging through your bathroom cabinets looking for something to dry themselves with. It also stops them seeing that you have penchant for Lovan, Emulide and that your not a natural blonde. We all have our secrets and some should remain this way. This courtesy and forethought will also encourage them to bathe; sad but true what can I say.

If they are with you for awhile clear some hanging space in the wardrobe or draws or provide them with some hangers at least to hang their ‘going out clothes’. This helps to keep your room tidy and clean (its still your room) and hopefully remind’s them of this. If they choose not to use either its their loss and if they look like homeless Myrtle in their supposed ‘non crinkle’ but very crinkled shirt it’s their fault not yours. A mirror is always a nice touch but not always possible. Having one available to them stops them creating a back up line for the bathroom; as they create their skunk doo; which is never ideal when you only have one bathroom. It also adds to a list of things that are starting to tick you off about them come day seven of their stay when the novelty of their presence may or may not be starting to wear off. I could tell you that I go so far as putting some photo frames, candles, books and magazines in the room but I have a tendency to go over the top and its just a nice added little thing.

So the room is set; then its just a couple of formalities that are essential in making sure you remain friends with your guest even after the stay. When guest’s in our house come to stay the rule in our house and its one my mother always said if you have been with us more than once and your second stay is longer than ten minutes then your no longer a guest and you are to treat the house as your own so to speak. We physically say this. Dangerous words I know but you be the judge.

Show them where the laundry is hint, hint and where dishes go; again hint, hint. They are your guest you are not there slave. The only other massive thing to remember; casually but firmly establish their  leaving dates and times from the moment they have settled down with their welcome coffee, wine or gin. Give them time in their space but get it done. It establishes a time line so when their over amorous bed room activities become to much, you know how long you need to keep your mouth shut for. Remember you want to stay friends, or do you?

Other than that my friends you are set. They have a nice space to not only sleep in but to escape to for a couple of hours and you can rest happily knowing that you have done your bit to make them feel welcome. Everyone is happy.

So enjoy the extra bodies long bathroom lines, extra dishes, strange sleeping and living habits of others; you may or may not learn something. Enjoy the late nights, too much food, too much drink and to much laughing is its not forever and its what guest’s are made for and what memories are made of.

Enjoy.

xx Deb