the fifo wife

Late last year things got messy. I wrote about here. It got messy. It was coming out of my orifices. I got cluttered in every aspect of my life it felt like I had too much stuff. I had too much stuff in the pantry, in my cupboard, in my inbox and to-do file. It was crazy and overwhelming so after finally seeing, feeling I had too much stuff I drastically started to simplify, declutter and cull. Instantly life became lighter, easier and less frantic or so my head thinks.

One of the first things I dealt with was my ‘digital life’. My digital life despite being paperless was becoming a head in the sand type situation. Going into my inbox was daunting a nightmare. I ignored my media channels something I had enjoyed so much previously because there was so much of it more than I could take in.

So these are a few steps I did to help keep things simple and as cliche as it sounds life just got better.
1. Create an admin day. My admin day has become Monday where I do all my emails; paperwork and bill paying. My admin da was once Thursday because it was when payday was. However I since changed it out to Monday as it’s the day with the least interruptions, and I can get all the emails read and dealt with, mail sent off, paperwork filed and bills finalised.
2. Have at least three emails addresses. I know its meant to become simplified right; cleaned up. There is a reason, and it’s to keep things safe and junk free as possible. I have one for shopping online, one for personal business and one for random on the street surveys you just can’t say ‘no to’. These street surveys are the ones most likely to add your name to marketing lists who will bomb your box with spam. I have personal, and business coming into my Outlook and the other is via the external server of Google.
3. Sort your email folders and inbox out. So when you have dealt with an email if it needs to be kept, keep it or if not then delete.
4. Spend some time unsubscribing yourself to all the feeds{blogs, Instagram and twitter}, emails, newsletters, shopping promo’s you have subscribed to but never read or used.
5. If you follow a lot of blogs, consider doing it in one spot. I have become a major fan of Bloglovin. I read all my stuff in one place it stops all the messy RSS feeds coming into my email but Bloglovin is just one reader, but there is a dozen about. In case you’re interested {she sheepishly says} this is the link to the ‘wifes’ page

Any tips that you can share??

{Image with thanks to here content written by Debbie @thefifowife.com.au}

Husband came home Saturday the house already noisier in find a corner out of sight and listen noisier. I am getting back into the routine of starting work earlier but think I have it down pact with an early rise and mostly everything but blog post done the day before. I will forever be a write by the seat of my pants type of girl, so untrue however for every other aspect of my life.

It’s the fourth week of the school year. Fourth week of Feb and already I’m predicting it’s going to be a very fast year. So hold onto your hats lovelies, this is the few things that for whatever reason have stuck and running through my head.

1. Reflective lycra does nothing for diminishing the size of one’s bum what it does do is say hey look at me.

2. I’m working with a 21-year-old backpacker who said to me yesterday I don’t drink with girls who have been drinking or are drunk. Technically that’s rape, and that just ain’t on. Josh’s mum who has done a good job their love.

3. Did I tell you how much I dislike the farm work but love the work never dealt with such a bigger catch 22 ever?Next time you’re devouring an avocado think of me in the paddock scrambling trees to get them for you.

4. Mum Shona {the dog} is the same age as you. She has a hair out of her chin. Thanks, .baby just what I need to hear after being surrounded by 20-year-old somethings all day

5.  I should mention stamina wise I could run rings around them that counts for something right?

6. The best of the Oscars parties here.

7. They pay them too much throw the word hero to often and it’s the very reason my kids don’t ball football rugby whatever the hell it is. Here

8. The power of the female brain here.

9. Turn your weakness into strengths here.

10. This is too shocking? Who would have thought? here.

xxDeb

I can do most things confidently. I can do an oil change out, change a tyre, bait a hook and bake a cake. What I can not do with complete confidence {anymore} is make-up. Which is or was a pity because I love the look of the winged eye, it’s so very classic having been here in variations through the decades since the 1920’s, I love fashion I’m just not good at it.

The winged eye worn with extra makeup or on its own was what I noticed most about the makeup of women when we went to Paris last year. Most ladies wore ‘the wing’ regardless of their age, and I figure the French know something about style. Sometimes they had lip but most often it appeared it was just the eye.

So yes I’m talking makeup. And I’m talking liquid liner both very rare topics here because its out of my area of but that’s because I don’t know much about either.

I am very mush a lash and brow girl have them styled, and you’re dressed no matter the occasion.

So, I learnt a trick the other day that I had to share, and it’s as simple as dot to dot, and anyone can do dot to dot.

After prepping the eyelid with primer or whatever you are using or not using.

1. Do a series of dots close to the eye line.
2. Join the dots.
3. Add a small wing if you so desire.
4. Finish a coat of mascara on your lashes.

Viola.

Just remember practice makes perfect, or so my boys tell me.

xDeb

I was looking at this picture of my boys in the bathtub the other day, and I gave into crying. In this image they were 3, 2 and 12 months old and to be honest, I sat there looking not really believing that we have made it this far.

Those first years are hard ones I don’t care what people say.

No one can comprehend the work it takes with little ones, especially three small ones until you are out the other side. The sleep deprivation. The levels of exhaustion both physically and mentally that you can get you to is incomprehensible. And that’s not even taking into account other factors like keeping house, jobs or keeping partners happy.

My husband and I had three babies by our choosing with an age gap of 17 months apart, and it was tough. It was, even tougher doing it with my husband working offshore again by our choosing and yet change it? Never.

Now many would possibly say that they regret not spending more time with them. That they should have baked more, mothered better, crafted more, danced more to high 5, had more patience, did more with them, even fed them more organically. I could regret most of that if I believed in regret, but I don’t. I did all that I could. I was and am a good mum.

Yet it was while looking at that picture of my three chubby babies one thing struck me with great surprise. It was the realisation how little they were that I had been on my own without support; with the exception- who worked 4000kms from us, of my husband since the birth of B1. I suddenly realised how I had been so hard to myself then, and suddenly wished I hadn’t and wished that Id taken care of me better.

Sitting there looking at this picture I found myself thinking I had wished Id rested more, taken better care of myself, taken time to do whatever it was I needed to. I wish I had accepted the help of my neighbours more. If I had done then, I might not be scrambling to find my feet so much now. My mental and physical health would have been better then, and I know I would have enjoyed them more too and them me.

Instead, I ran on adrenaline because back then pure exhaustion saw me busy trying to make it through the day. I didn’t have time for me. I had expectations to fill, and none of them included me. That is not to say I didn’t try to take care of me. My husband did his utmost to help nurture some part of who I was he tried so hard, but I allowed guilt, expectation and the opinions of others regardless of whether they had one stop me.

After all this was our doing, I must ‘suck up the consequence’ of our decisions but the truth it’s nothing like that I had people wanting to help me. I just wouldn’t allow them to because ‘this was our decision’, and I must ‘suck it up’. I saw it as to accept help meant I was a ‘less than a parent’. That perhaps people would see me as or would pity me as that stereotypical mother with too many children who couldn’t cope and with her husband working ‘away’  well that was just an added bonus for my over thinking. However this is not just a FIFO issue this is a parent issue. So in saying that this ‘idea’ of what people thought of me was so far removed from the truth I wasn’t even on the same planet as my ‘idea’.

However, this is not just a FIFO issue this is a parent issue. FIFO just makes it trickier.

So in saying that this ‘idea’ of what people thought of me was so far removed from the truth I wasn’t even on the same planet as my ‘idea’.

It’s was not like that at all. Having said that there is always exception except for people who have high riding horses however the world will receive them eventually with the bloody nose they deserve be it from altitude sickness or the sudden fall into reality don’t worry about them I did and shouldn’t have.

So take half an hour or more to do whatever it is you need to do. To keep yourself healthy, well and to keep you from being lost. It’s important in keeping you so you are the best parent {and partner} you can be for now and later.

And stop being so hard on yourself.

Now if that means having ABC 2 babysit for a time do it. Placing the kids in a port a cot while you treadmill it, gym it, craft it, or giving into pride and accepting the help of others do it. If it means foregoing the housework to take 20 minutes for you, do it. Houses are to be lived in not looked at. Thats what Vogue living is for.

It’s how good healthy parents and children are created.
Xx Deb

How was your weekend sweet things? Ours was the last before husband gets home from work. Seven days of doing everything, I should have done in the last twenty-one, but it will get done, right? That’s the main thing right?
It rained all weekend. We didn’t get the deluge that they predicted but still it rained enough that TV was all the weekend was good for and for many that is a wasted weekend- not here. It was just what me and the boys needed. So we embraced it wholeheartedly because typically the week before was crazy good.
Now it’s the third week of February, and we are just weeks from Autumn I can hear my thighs saying thank goodness for that- the safety only the Jean can offer.
These are the few things running through my head because for whatever reason they linger in my wee mind and have caught my attention.
1.In case you don’t follow the facebook page Big Boy the cancer drug wonder dog left us.He fought gallantly to the end, and we are better for having been able to have him.
2. I have dealt with my share of cancer nursed and beared witness too many with the disease. I have seen the suffering and indignity it brings. Seeing the peacefulness of euthanasing Big Boy has brought such questions to my mind about euthanasia and terminal illness. His time was here he was ready because he could no longer get to his feet. Why can’t us here in Australia have the same dignity? We are a progressive nation. Why can’t we have the same screening that happens in some states of the US and Switzerland?
3. I can’t stop think about my husband the every thought of him brings a smile to my dial.
4. I’m avocado packing much more enjoyable than mangos. My favourite thing is lunch time and not for what you think. It’s the backpackers every lunch without fail they pull out a picnic of the simplest of things cheese bread salami ham and a pickle all awhile chatting away in their lingo.
5. I finally had an a-ha moment about caring and carrying it will be on the blog this week.
6. This clip will make your Monday
7. Johnny Depp’s got married yep I didn’t even get an invite here.
8. Adult toys.
9. The coolest buildings in the world; I love good building design it’s a thing. Here.
10. Gweneth steams her vagina yes she does – no I don’t recommend doing it especially at home. Here.