the fifo wife

 (Photo courtesy Kate Murray, Kate Murray Photography)

These images have gone viral for good reason.

To me, they are a powerful visual depiction of what mothers love is.

For Kate Murray the Florida Based photographer who had the honour to capture the images of mum feeding baby despite having undergone chemotherapy and a mastectomy was

“Strength, love, and pure raw beauty”.

According to reports the mother in the photo was diagnosed with stage 3 breast cancer while she was pregnant. She went through chemotherapy and had one breast removed while carrying her baby. The birth was induced at 36 weeks in order for her to receive more treatment.

Kate Murray the photographer who captured the images reportedly said via her Facebook page

“Baby boy was born ready to prove to the world his strength he inherited from his strong mommy.

 He latched on to her remaining breast all on his own and the room erupted in so many emotions.

Breastfeeding is such a sacred bond, and this one just makes my heart break and swell at the same time.

I am beyond blessed to have met and gotten to know this woman and her family, and so honored she asked me to be there to document these precious moments.”- Kate Murray.

Currently, Breast cancer is the most commonly diagnosed cancer among women in Australia (excluding non-melanoma skin cancer). With one in eight women developing breast cancer in their lifetime and in rare cases 1% in men. Early detection is critical in increasing survival rates.

Kate Murrays Facebook account has since been disabled, and I am unable to locate her or her contact details. All credits of the images are credited to her.

xx Deb

 

The email read we are doing a show on windfalls can I call you. I like what you have written on your blog.

I emailed back telling her 2pm would be okay.

She called at 2pm on the dot. I opened the fridge to make dinner while I took her call but before she could begin I said I don’t think that I am the right fit for your show. This wasn’t a windfall we worked for this life.

No no, she replied we have sports stars, actors all attending. She was very ‘confident’ and proceeded without breath.

Okay, I thought perhaps I misunderstood, and so I proceeded to answer her questions.

So how has this job changed your life she asked.

Immediately I was confused but given I’m easily confused I continued.

I said to her we have always worked this way, and we have always worked, so nothing had really changed, so we have always made good money. I have always worked three jobs, my husband, the same. I started work at 13 years old my husband started worked at 11years old neither of us have ever stopped working.

She asked more questions, and I answered but I either wasn’t understanding or I wasn’t giving her the answers she was looking for it could have been either. I continued telling her initially when we started offshore it was a money then roster decision, but now we have children, and we are older its roster. We work this way for the lifestyle now not the money the lifestyle was the windfall I said to her.

So she asked again quoting my blog how has it changed your life well I said I am a stay at home mum I guess otherwise I couldn’t have been. And what about your home she said? Our home? I asked confused. Yes, your home she repeated back. We have the same house that we brought when we were twenty-three it was then I got the impression she was asking about other ‘toys’ that ‘winfalls’ can buy. And so I said we don’t have a flash house or ‘toys’. We don’t have new cars. All the money we make goes towards our dream of being able to retire early so we can enjoy our life with our children. We have invested our money we haven’t flittered it away on ‘toys’.

What about additional holidays do you buys extra things for the kids. No, I said we might go on a holiday other every year that other families can’t go on, but my kids don’t get toys given to them.

I was still confused how our job could be seen as a windfall as I don’t believe in luck. I don’t understand how my hard work my husbands hard work before then and now could be seen as windfall. Nothing more than a streak of luck something that randomly happened by sheer coincidence and so I am not sure I answered her questions correctly. Because frankly I was so confused how it wasn’t blatantly clear that this wasn’t something we won in the lottery. This was a job like any other and it paid well but for a reason. We worked for the tickets; we applied for the job, we got not backed, we tried again, we persevered for two years, we got the job, and we lived a hard life at times by our choosing so how was that a win fall. The same went for our financal position, our kids, our life.

I was also confused how sports stars would have their talent and hard work seen as a windfall and that perhaps I had been delusional all these years. And I was completely off the mark.

I could sense she was frustrated by my inability to give her what she wanted.

So at that point I started to doubt my stance my position that one we lived this for the lifestyle and two that had been given to us, and I was just ignorant of it.

So I said trying to explain perhaps my inability to answer her questions that I was nervous about talking to her as a lot of people assume we are money hungry when it’s not the case. I was trying to cover for what I thought was my mistake, my misunderstanding. She explained the reasoning for asking the questions it was to see if I was suitable for the show.

Okay, I said fine still not seeing the point and we recommenced questioning.

So how has the money changed your marriage she asked.

I was in the hallway at this point, and as she said it I looked at my feet while rolling my eyes because I knew at this point I wasn’t wrong. I wasn’t delusional and my belief that none of this happened by accident was right and so I answered with a flat it hasn’t.

It hasn’t she said at all?

No, I said it hasn’t.

I could still hear her typing furiously in the background.

Then it came.

Debbie, I think your right you’re not the right fit for our show. We will be in touch.

I haven’t heard from her, and I’m rather sure I don’t want to.

I also pity any of the actors, sports stars or any other FIFO participants who have taken this five minutes of fame offer. The very concept will downplay every effort they have made towards their career their goals their successes to nothing but a windfall something that is given away to any Tom Dick or Harry.

A successful life be it FIFO or not isn’t a windfall it doesn’t happen by accident or a game of chance it’s not luck it takes work. It takes hard work by every person on the ‘team’ and nobody should downplay it to a ‘windfall’.

What do you think? Should any attribute any of their success to luck? 

 

When I was growing up in the 80’s beef stew was one dish that my mother made sparingly and when she did it was always when we were camping in Kakadu. I supposed despite being considered slow comfort and cheap food back then we were surviving off buffalo meat, crab and barra {a child of the NT} and beef was a luxury when interest rates were 22%. Those stews when we did have them would be so flavoursome and meaty that I would sit by the camp fire in anticipation for it to be ready. It was also one of the few meals I would go back for seconds for. Ever since I have been trying to recreate that recipe but I have decided unless I can transport the smells and sounds that were my childhood back into my kitchen its just not going to be possible. Eating a bowl of stew whilst watching the movements of a croc whilst he sat and watched your own will never be possible in a kitchen settled deep in the mountains of FNQ.

So I have searched high and low experimenting asking mum for her secrets only to be told a cast iron pot is all I will need. This recipe is one of three combined cooking in a cast iron pot is opitional.

Beef Stew.

What you will need:

1 kilo of stew beef
2 tablespoons vegetable oil
2 cups water
1 tablespoon Worcestershire sauce
1 clove garlic, peeled
1 or 2 bay leaves
1 medium onion, sliced
1 teaspoon salt
1 teaspoon sugar
1/2 teaspoon pepper
1/2 teaspoon paprika
Dash ground allspice
3 large carrots, sliced
3 ribs celery, chopped
1/2 cup of frozen peas
2 tablespoons cornstarch
1 tablespoon of tomato paste

How to:

Chop meat into cubes and cover with corn starch.
Brown meat in hot oil.
Add water, Worcestershire sauce, garlic, bay leaves, onion, salt, sugar, pepper, paprika, and allspice.
Cover and simmer 1 1/2 hours.
Add carrots and celery. Cover and cook 30 to 40 minutes longer. Add tomato paste and halfa cup of peas in the last ten minutes of cooking.

Serve with mash or crusty bread.

xxDeb

{Image with thanks to here}

Is there one recipe from your childhood that you just have trouble recreating?

Anzac day 2015. No words my town does two wonderful services every year to commemorate the fallen and the serving a dawn service at the Avenue of honour celebrating those lost at Afghanistan and in town remembering those who fought before them. Every year its seems bigger.

Lest we forget

xxDeb

All images with thank you to Melissa Horton Photography.