the fifo wife

He went back yesterday. So adjusted are my boys to this lifestyle and that daddy is just going back to work that they opted just to stay home, say good bye and go to school. I was proud but disappointed that we couldn’t be whole for just a few more hours. B3 came though. There were no tears from him. We dropped FIFO husband off outside the airport doors as normal. We did the normal kiss and thank you for a fantastic month. Jumped back in the car before the surly security guard interrupted the serenity.

As we drove off B3 jumped up, head out the window and yells in his best 3 year old voice byyyye dad. Byyyyye dad. Byyyye dad. Loooooove you. He did that till FIFO husband was out of site. He wasnt sad. There were no tears that part came from me. Thats when for a split second you wonder if this is right. Thats what the tears are for. The tears they don’t last long you cant afford it to. We made the long drive home and well after allowing the rules to be bent just a little (they got to stay up late 830pm) just because I wanted their giggly chatter for just a little longer.

So here we are 530 am, first load of wash is done, chickens are fed and I’m about to make lunches and start dinner. Ahh the grind but what makes it worth it. FIFO husband called whilst we stopped for a quick coffee before we headed up the hill and said thank you. Thank you for all sorts. That thank you makes this all so worth it.

Thank you lovelies…have a great Friday,

Chat soon

xx Deb

I few weeks ago I wrote a piece for the fantastic website Stay at home Mum. You should visit has some great tips and tricks for surviving on one wage. Great ideas. Love it and Jodie the website creator is just the loveliest girl.

So passionate about this life of mine I wrote a round up of tips and tricks I use to manage. It was well recieved so I thought I would share it with you.

1. Honesty and Communication. Really this is a no brainer and its the same in any relationship but with FIFO both of you have lots of quite time to think and with to much thinking can often result in to much stuff happening thats not really a problem in the first place. So if you have got a problem talk about it. Its essential that any problems or concerns are aired. Talk about it until there is nothing left to talk about. Be honest with how you feel. Dont be hurtful just honest and dont wait until there is a problem.

2.Making Couple time. Im often frowned on because I will put my husbands and my relationship over my kids however my theory is happy mum and dad equals a really happy home and isnt thats what its all about. So I encourage dates and make an effort to be intrested in each other. After all there is a reason you fell in love in the first place.

3.Having routine for the kids. Im strict with my routine. Its been my saving grace. I have used one since my first baby was born and its still in place. With FIFO I think that routine is essential. Mine operates around meal times and the kids must be in bed by 730pm. I continue to use routine when dad comes home other wise its a nightmare when he goes back to work.

4.Daddy/ mummy isnt leaving he/she is going to work. I think telling the kids that mum or dad is off to work rather than he is leaving again is better and the kids can process that better. We dont make a fuss about daddy going back to work we just ensure that the night before is good relaxed quality time. We also have a map in teh boys room where daddy works so they can see where he is. For us our daddy is off shore so we can track him via a website depending on which vessel he is on. I think making a deal of the parent leaving could develop anxiety.

5.Look after yourself and dont be afraid to ask for help. Easy to say but please dont be afraid to ask anyone for help. If you are not coping thats okay. Our job is masive and sometimes it becomes to much. Outsource some work if you can. Use a baby sitter. I was too embarrassed to ask for help and it resulted in about of depression and exhaustion. So in saying that give yourself 15 minutes a day if you can weather it be walking, mediating or reading something for you. Its essential that you are well to get through your shift or swing until your partner comes home to take the load off and when they do come home. Take a rest even for a day be selfish for just a minute you deserve it.

Is there any that you use that you can share? Have a lovely Friday.

XX Deb

Want to know what my husband is doing right now? Sewing. Sewing on his janome. Fixing his work pants pocket and showing my B3 in the process. Does it make him less of a bloke. I don’t think so. I love it. He is the sexiest man I have ever met and even more so when he is fixing his own uniforms,  making me an apple crumble and even more so when he waltzed me around St Marks square in Venice. He is as ‘blokiest’ as the next man. In fact he is more man than Joe blow down the road who swills beer and chases pigs for fun and much sexier too.

Him and his five siblings where raised by his Nana and there were three things his Nana made sure they could do before they were let out into the big wild world.  Through lifestyle and necessity before they left home they had to know how to sew, dance (the old fashioned way) and cook. Each one of his siblings, four boys and one girl can cook, sew and dance to perfection.

To be able to take of themselves in any situation.

Its fantastic and its a legacy I would love to pass on to my boys.

So what do you want your children to learn from you?

Hope that you are having a wonderful Tuesday,

xx Deb

Braised Beef..Debs version

The original recipe is here I have changed it for a slower cooker and added some stuff so as per normal quantities and times are guess work

What you will need:

• 1 kilogram well marbled boneless beef a stewing steak or similar
• 2 teaspoons ground allspice
• 8 onions, halved lengthwise, then thinly sliced lengthwise (6 cups)
• 6 large garlic cloves, finely chopped
• splash of port
• 1 cup of beef stock
• Salt and pepper

 How to:

Pat meat dry. Stir together allspice, 2 teaspoons salt, and 1 teaspoon pepper in a small bowl and rub all over meat.

Spread half of onions and half of garlic in a 13- by 9-inch with knob of butter on the base of slow cooker and arrange meat on top. Spread remaining onions and garlic over meat. Add a splash of port and beef stock. Tightly cover pan with foil and turning meat over after 1 hour, cook until meat is very tender, on which ever setting you would like.

Skim fat from pan juices.

The trick with this recipe is to ensure very little moisture escapes from the cooker otherwise it may be a little dry..its a fairly dry dish anyway but you could create a gravy to go with it?

I served with mashed potato and carrots..yum!

FIFO husband goes to  work Thursday. He jet sets his way to one city to do a course then jet sets to another very very cosmopolitan city for the ‘weekend’ before joining his vessel for what I imagine will be 12 hours a day of exhausting work in a compound in the middle of the ocean with 16 foot seas. It is hard work I know that but I’m not talking about then I’m talking about now. I’m a here and now kind of girl.

So I asked him the other day are you looking forward to going back to work. I waited for the pause. I waited for the long drawn out yeah I suppose. No it was not is was yes. It was a straight away not having to think about it yes. I was reeled at the quickness of the yes. Consquently he has been in a good mood since he found out he is going back to work and its irritating. That good mood is irritating. Now he is normally is a good mood type of person and so am I but this is singing, whistle blowing good mood. I like to think I’m not moody, jealous, even tempered but this whistling, singing, talking about hotels, hire cars and what the weather will be like is really starting to tick me off as I think about my lonely nights and cold mornings.

Yet this is another new adventure for him and when it comes down to it I’m supportive of him and his career. And in reality I know that good mood is relief, relief that he has another contract to go to. Bills will be paid. I understand that but its also a new adventure, new vessel, new crew and I am excited for him really I am just as he is supportive of me, my shop and this little blog of mine. And I love my job just not right now. Right now all I can hear are the kids fighting, FIFO husband is trying to get B1 ready for school and its just so damn cold in this old house, so cold its uncomfortable. And its just that my adventure doesn’t take me away to exotic locations, cosmopolitan cities and glamorous hotels. And if I hear one more question about whether his five star hotel has a laundry, or is walking distance to the gold cinema I will freaking scream.

Oh well my lovelies I’m off to do the laundry..oh the adventures my laundry holds..lol.

xx Deb