the fifo wife

Okay it’s not often I talk men fashion trends actually it’s never this is a first because husband and I are hardly the ones to quote on fashion but this was too good to pass up.

Nail Armour for men. It’s the bloke’s term for nail polish. Something I had always thought of as women’s fashion item. Wholly a women’s item since 1917 but you know it would seem the men and I’m not talking the Adam Lambert’s or George Michaels of the world I mean your man and mine apparently have felt like they have been missing out all that time. And so Nail Armour has been created as their solution to this major gap in the beauty department.

Now I’m all for a little manscaping notice I said the word little but Nail Armour ahem nail polish I think would raise a little to many questions for me as to what exactly my husband may be doing at work on that rig.

Yet here it is Nail Armour. It’s sounds so manly don’t you think? Nail Armour.

Its just that Im not quite sure if I can see my husband, my neighbour’s husband John or my good trucker friend Steve walking around the site wearing a shade of Nail Armour.

It brings to my mind so many questions that I’m too frightened to ask my husband or men of the world. If they feel like they are missing out on a bit of nail polish then what else do they feel like they are missing out on? What else do they want of ours? A little waxing although a little waxing never hurt any man; much, exfoliating or perhaps a little lace too? And where would they apply it; the Nail Armour? Whilst sitting at the pub enjoying a cold one. Each painting each other’s nails or perhaps they would gather after a shift in the locker room’s. So many questions Im frankly to scared to ask.

Seriously.

So Nail Armour is put out by Alpha Black. Is dispensed in a high tech easily managed pen and comes in two collections matt and metallics. Shade names are a very masculine ‘Diesel’ ‘Burnin rubber’ and my favourite ‘Benjamin’s’ a sweet pale green perfect for spring. But if the colours and their very blokey regular Joe names fail to win you over; here are the main reasons your man should be wearing Nail polish  Armour as marketed by Armour Black; the pick-up kings right hand man..as quoted by them.

1. Its designed by men worn by warriors. Yes I could see a gladiator fixing his nails before battle that indeed would help increase his chances of slaying his opposition.

2. Get more sex wearing it..yes this may be the case just not from your wife..

3. Swagger do it because you can…I’m not quite sure I get it..perhaps a bucks night tactic?

4. Cover up because nobody likes the fugly…if that’s the case head to the pharmacy now and get a bottle of Canesten. Run don’t walk.

5. Battle strength when you need it…yes again when heading into war it will indeed give you the strength you need. Having your opposition rolling in fits of laughter far too weak to fight, will definitely give you the upper hand. I’m not sure why the Australian Defence Force aren’t issuing Nail Armour as part of the deployment packs?

6. To rock because you play to win…ah I don’t know what to say..

7. Your style look good feel good…yes your style. Your very own style..

So my lovelies for more details on this emerging new trend for men or perhaps to grab your man a bottle of burnin rubber head here.

The website is guaranteed to put a smile on your dial.

But tell me my lovelies what would you say if you partner came home from work with a little burnin rubber on his nails?

Have a great day lovelies,

xx Deb

Its Monday! How was your weekend my lovelies. This weekend saw me and the FIFO husband painting the rental that we own. We are down to the trimmings and windows having finished all the walls. We have managed I must saw bursting with immense pride and satisfaction done it with out a mean word muttered.

Yet painting leaves you with one thing to much time to think.

So here are the top ten things that ran through my head this weekend. In no particular order.

1. The last time I painted the exterior of the house I did it with a baby strapped to my back. OH & S completely would not have approved neither would have child safety but pffft it got the job in half the time with non of the stress. From me or the kid. It also occurred to me that my life is getting so much easier as the boys get older and how happy that makes me.

2. So Sunday saw us busy painting. It also saw my boys aged 7, 5, 3 years old get there own lunch. They got left overs put it into microwave containers popped them into the micro wave heated them up, dished them into bowls and poured them selves a drink. They also made a strawberry sandwich for the 3 year old brother. The pride I felt; despite the food they had stretched from the sink to the microwave could have been a second helping to serve China, must have been the same pride my mother felt when she discovered at age 8 I could also make myself some dinner whilst her and her friends indulged in some alcoholic beverages under what we affectionately called the poofta tree. Yes you read that right. It was the 80’s. It was Darwin. What can I say and no I dont know why it was called that.

3. Google has made me a hypochondriac. I have a ‘ting’ developed in my left ear every time I hear a loud noise  or I yell at the kids. I googled it. I could have tinnitus or the start of MS. Guess which I have decided to obsess over?

4. Speaking of obsessing. I have become a sun cream freak. Freak. I’m the pale one with the hat in the corner. Never can you have enough. I wish I could say it was for health reasons no I’m vain I don’t want or need any more life lines on my face. Although the damage is done although I’m told its nothing a chemical peel cant fix. Yet if I could tell my sixteen year old self anything it would be wear sunscreen that and you are a smart cookie. don’t believe a word that Paula girl said even though she has gone on to being a world class disease researcher. What would she know? Sunscreen? So my favourite brand at the moment is the Woolworth’s band select and no I don’t have an association I just like it. Its light non greasy smells good and has vitamin a and e thrown in for good measure. Slather it on I say.

5. I hate the way my feet look now as mush as I ever did although given I have them I should learn to appreciate their value.

6. Leggings are not pants and should not be worn as such.

7. Should I get the mullet chopped off and start again? I like these and these. Although don’t think my chubby little face could carry them off half as well.And I should accept that growing the mullet out may well be the only option.

8. I want to renew my wedding vow’s. I thought I would ask the same bloke I married given that we seem to be working out so well.

9. I feel so connected to the world right now that if I smile any harder my face will literally burst. I think that has to be the most alternate hippified thing I have ever said.

10. And I finally met someone else that is as shy as me..I could have cried screamed and carried on with happiness just to have met someone who can relate to being mistaken for rude when in fact its terrible shyness…instead I sat looking at the ground to shy to say yes that’s me me me yes thank god you understand that’s me.

Well thats it my lovelies hope you had a great weekend and given its now Monday night a fantastic Monday,

xx Deb

 

Its the weekend my lovelies. Its been a crazy busy week and Im glad for the weekend. Halloween was a success. My B1 went up in his reading levels you cant believe how proud I am. There was basket ball presentations where I screamed myself hoarse. Then as the week came to a close the whole thing just seemed to turn to custard. So I am pleased to be able just to sit and ponder this morning.

This weekend however we are painting the outside of the rental that we own. Husband and I. Together.

We dont DIY very well together. Seperatly great things have been achieved. Great things but the last effort of the bathroom saw me running from the hammer that was being thrown not at me but in my ‘general’ direction.

Good times are in store my lovelies.

What are you doing this weekend?

xx Deb

Its Friday..what more can I say..

Ingredients needed to make a Vodka Collins:

• Vodka
• lemon juice (or sweet and sour mix)
• granular (or powder) sugar
• club soda
• ice
• Cherry
• lemon/orange slice
• Collins glass

How to make a Vodka Collins:

1. Pour 1.5 – 2 ounces of vodka into a glass.
1.5 is the standard amount (a shot of vodka) but no harm in being a little heavy handed in your pour

2. Fill your glass with 1 ounce of lemon juice .
When it comes to ingredients, the fresher the better. A lot of people, due to convenience, will opt to use sweet and sour mix or even lemonade at this step. I strongly suggest that you pick up some fresh lemons, cut them open, and get to squeezing that fresh juice. If you’ve ever had homemade lemonade, you know that nothing store bought can compete!

3. Add 1 Tablespoon of sugar.
This step is about how tart you like your drink. This isn’t your typical lemonade so having your cocktail a little sour might be more appealing to balance out the burn of the alcohol. (Sugar not necessary if you used sweet and sour mix)

4. Stir/Shake and pour through a strainer into a Collins glass filled with ice.
This step can be skipped if you opted for the sweet and sour mix route. You just want to get rid of any pulp from your drink.

5. Add 4-6 oz of soda water.
This will create the bubbly filler in your homemade lemonade cocktail and really liven it up. Use as much soda water as you feel necessary.

6. Garnish with 1 cherry and a lemon or orange slice.
Presentation is everything, so make that Vodka Collins shine with a little garnish.

Have a great Friday my lovelies,

xx Deb

Its been a day where everything has turned to custard. Routines out the window. It started with husband and I having a ‘word’ over paint. Paint for Christ sake. He left only to return with paint charts the crux of our ‘word’ I wont say who was right because he reads this and well if I oust him I may never get an apology. I then ran late for the gym only to find it was closed so walked near on half an hour to kill the time until it opened but I find it amusing I drive 15 minutes to use a runner, bike, rowing machine and cross trainer. I continued the late theme being late for arts and craft B3 was not impressed with me for making HIM late and told me so. Then we were late for swimming lessons due to me being late back from the vet the swimming teacher was not impressed and neither were the kids.

Then we lost the dog in town; I was near on having a fit. She got out of the car as husband was loading the shopping while I was at the pool being late so technically he lost her not me but have said we because we are a partnership and all that jazz so its we who lost the dog. I wont tell him that she has done that to me once before. Although I did realise that her little body was missing from my lap and was instead sitting patiently on the kerb before I drove off leaving her poor blind and deaf self in the Woolworths car park. I wont tell him; I will just allow him to read that here because that’s what he gets for telling me to calm down when clearly I didn’t want to calm down. That dog is my baby my poodle. She needs me now in old age as much as I need her. Fortunately someone had the good grace to take her to the local vet. She seemed very much unfazed by her adventure me however I am contemplating some sort of clinic.

The day has since continued to slide and I’m contemplating making trifle out of the custard that surrounds me. I haven’t vacuumed, nor moped, or scrubbed the toilet and despite it being close on 730pm I’m expecting my mother in law to burst through the doors in song as we speak you know just to add to the finality of the day. The kids have also decided to join in with making custard and hated my dinner ate it but pulled every face imaginable it would have been okay if I hadn’t made the same dish a dozen times before. Their bed time is 7pm however they are still currently in the bath fighting with each other.

Husband is screaming at them from the kitchen and after running all day I can smell myself and it is not pretty oh and whats that I see popped up on my reminder..a gynaecologists appointment tomorrow yes of course I do…

Life is bliss. No really it is.

xx Deb