a fifo wife {fifo life: me: breaking up}

We were sitting in a small Japanese cafe it was small, noisey and it had been months since I had seen her. I had missed her. She was sensitive, quirky, funny and always fun to chat to. We had met through work at the hotel I had worked at before becoming ‘a mum’ and we instantly became friends. Despite her living in the city and I in the country our friendship flourished. I soon left work to travel overseas but still we kept in touch, then I had a baby but still we stayed in touch through the odd lunch and text. My 30^th birthday rolled around I was pregnant with my second baby and she helped my husband make it a surprise and I loved having her there. We didn’t see each other a lot but I loved it when we managed a date. She still single..career spurred..travel filled..I loved hearing about her world..

It was then somewhere between my second and third baby that we met up for dinner and here we were in this little Japanese Cafe.

We made small talk catching up on her going on’s and how she preferred it if I didn’t ask her about her love life any more…a incredibly bad habit of mine with my single friends but it was my ice breaker a tease- a terrible one but much the same as when people ask me how long husband is away for.. I took it in apologising and explaining why I said what I said and that I was sorry I had upset her and I was- genuinely sorry. Perhaps I thought to myself this is why she hasn’t called more- yes of course it was- it’s a bad habit asking about my single friends love lives I said I must stop.. I had been told off by another once before all of this internal chatter going on while I smiled and listened to her chat about her new home.

It was somewhere between talking about where she had got the screen door and a quick fling with her ex that it came. Debbie she said I don’t like children she said.  I looked at her. Okay I said. I wasn’t shocked or hurt; nothing. I knew that it’s what we had once shared in common. She didn’t want children nor did I at the time which is part of why we hung out. But you have them she said. Yes I said last time I counted I had two and may be three I said.

I continued with just because I have children doesn’t mean we can’t hang out. I don’t expect you to hang out with my kids I understand it’s okay. We can just do this I smiled eating the last of my Teriyaki chicken. I can’t remember what she said but we continued with dinner making small talking and when dinner was over we promised to catch up again.

I walked to my car and sat in the dark and thought about what had unfolded over dinner. Which then lead me to think back to her reaction to her being served dessert in a Lightening Mc Queen plate at the last dinner party she came to. At the time Lightening Mc Queen was big in our house and we had lost most of the good dinnerware to the floor but it was a plate to eat off. In the dark I went over our conversation at dinner. Did I talk about the kids to much then at that dinner party, our last lunch and now here at dinner. I hadn’t meant to but they were my current fulltime job; my life consisted of very little but them. But despite there being more of me and as dull as it was to some I didn’t actually mind that they consumed me I liked it in fact most days I loved it.

Something about tonight didn’t sit right and it wasn’t the chicken. Not always the brightest bulb in the pack I stayed sitting in the dark in the car.

I was listening to the bats going nuts in the trees over head when it dawned on me sitting in the dark in my car- she I think had just broken up with me in a roundabout sort of way. We I guess had nothing in common any more. A little wave of sadness washed over me as it dawned on me. We were broken up. Our friendship over like that corny poem it served its purpose but still I would miss her. Their was no malice I understood. I saw her only the once after that she was leaving the state she had come to say good bye I remember saying to her stay in touch and she said yes she would but I suspected she wouldn’t and  she never did and really that’s okay because not all friendships last forever.

Have you ever been broken up with? Your done the breaking up with?

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