He was lying there on the beach his hands on his chest smiling. His skin reddy brown from too many shirtless days on the job, in the boat and now here. She was on her knees in a bikini the water lapping at her feet he was in his pair of Australian flag speedo’s the white sand whiter still on his skin.
The sand was so very fine the water so cool, and if I remember right it was Police Mans Bay Gove and we had driven here on the back of a ute sitting on a mattress. It was perhaps midday or just before I’m not sure not that it is important.
I was some distance from them sitting in the water but had walked over and saw that he was smiling but she was not. He was there but not. Still kneeling her hands on her thighs I remember her saying to him it’s this or us but being so young I never knew what that meant.
When asked do you recall this he says no, and so I sit wondering did I imagine it? Perhaps. Regardless however I know there is a crowd the one that exists in FIFO work where life is a party. It exists in all types of industries but FIFO is an easy target and blaming FIFO for alcohol and drug problems is easy. Just as it’s easy to say all truckies have a meth problem, all defence like some e and have a girl in every town or port, that jockeys are bulimic and station hands are mull heads.
Regardless of industry or not those that fall into that crowd do so on their own. Nobody sits them down with a beer or joint in hand when they start their induction. When they board that flight for their first FIFO job, they don’t say drink this and smoke that till your health is at risk and your marriage is no more. Live life as a single man and forgo your family at home. They make that choice despite knowing not to; out of site should never be out of mind if it happens then perhaps they were never in the for front?
And while I know it to be true that often drugs and alcohol is used medicinally for depression I know and have witnessed it, it doesn’t make it okay. It makes it an excuse. The options for treatment are endless, there is no excuse now. There is no reason for lying, stealing, abusing and cheating your family of security for the sake of a rush or engagement of a crowd.
And while he never did any of this, this man I love and admire. It never got to that point I believe my she made him make that choice sensing what could be having seen what was around her. And I’m not sure what prompted it that day. But she gave him a choice a consequence because without either I imagine he would have continued his ways but it was his choice to do so.
Either way it was four simple words that I’m sure were more than simple but the consequence simple enough- them or us.
Fortunately for him he had a strong wife who knew him well and would have supported him accordingly but I know if it had come to it she would never have stayed regardless of promises made and I wouldn’t have blamed her.
Life line 13 11 14.
xx Deb
